Category: Faith & Sex

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Grand Forks woman to demonstrate against bishop’s election message

Kate Kenna, a lifelong Catholic, career social worker and political progressive in Grand Forks, has mounted a reaction to news of a North Dakota bishop’s call to the faithful concerning voting.

A letter from Bishop David Kagan of Bismarck is to be read Sunday from all the Catholic pulpits in the state urging them to not support abortion, stem-cell research or same-sex marriage when voting.

Kenna bought a “City Briefs” ad in the Herald with a short message: “The bishop is bringing politics to church. Please wear a political button to Mass on Sunday to support the candidate of your choice.”

It began running Thursday online.

Kenna also called Joel Heitkamp at KFGO radio in Fargo, who talked about it Thursday on the air.

And Kenna has organized a sort of demonstration Sunday at her own parish, Holy Family. She and others, including her friend Thomasine Heitkamp, will be standing with others outside the church to show their disagreement with the bishop. The Heitkamps are siblings of Democratic Senate candidate Heidi Heitkamp.

Democrats upset

Kagan was appointed bishop in Bismarck in November and named apostolic administrator of the Fargo diocese this summer until a replacement bishop is announced.

It came to light the past week that Kagan sent a letter to all priests in the state to be read Sunday.

The bishop declined to release the letter pending its being read Sunday in churches. But he announced Thursday he will discuss the letter at 9 a.m. Tuesday on Real Presence Radio at 1370 AM in Grand Forks and 1280 AM in Fargo.

State Sen. Tim Mathern, D-Fargo, released the text of the letter and criticized it in a Forum Communications story Wednesday, saying it went over the line in directing Catholics how to vote.

Although Kagan’s letter does not mention parties or candidates by name, Mathern said it clearly was pointed at Democrats because of the party’s known support for the issues Kagan mentioned.

Plus, Mathern said the phrase used by Kagan telling Catholics not to vote for “the most likable” candidate appears to echo Republican ads referring to Heidi Heitkamp.

Friend of Heitkamps

Kenna said that’s how she sees it, too, especially as a longtime close friend of Thomasine and Heidi Heitkamp.

Catholics are taught to follow their own conscience, she said.

“I think I have a perfectly formed conscience,” said Kenna, who credits growing up going to St. Michael’s Elementary School and St. James High School in Grand Forks. That’s led her to devote her life to social work and to support the Democratic party because she sees it as caring for people.

“We can’t just look at being pro-life as just being pro-delivery,” Kenna said. “Being pro-life means all of life and that means people who are here, also.”

The church is a place where people of all political persuasions should feel welcome and be united in faith, not in politics, she said.

Church response

Christopher Dodson, executive director of the North Dakota Catholic Conference, a public policy and lobbying effort of the two dioceses in the state, agrees that partisan politics doesn’t belong in church. Nor does Bishop Kagan, who does not refer to any individuals or parties in his letter, Dodson said.

“There’s nothing new in the letter, it’s all Catholic teaching on how to form one’s conscience,” Dodson. His office has been sending similar messages to parishes in the state regularly since about Labor Day, he said.

The bishop’s reference to not voting for someone because they are “likable” reflects long-held Catholic teaching that the faithful should look at deeper issues than either pocketbook issues or a person’s personality, Dodson said. It’s not about Heitkamp or anyone in particular, he said.

“It’s not about influencing elections, it’s about the care of souls,” Dodson said. That’s why the bishop has been reluctant to discuss his letter before parishioners hear it themselves in church, not in a partisan debate on radio or television, Dodson said.

“People who are really involved in partisan politics get hyper-partisan around election time and everything they see gets interpreted through those partisan lenses,” he said. “I think parishioners will be pleasantly surprised when they finally hear the letter and see that it doesn’t deal with partisan politics.”

Faith and politics

Kenna long has taken her faith and her politics seriously.

In the fall of 1968 at the height of the Vietnam War, a woman regularly stood across the street from St. James High School, holding a sign protesting the war, Kenna remembers. “She wasn’t allowed to come on the school grounds.”

A junior, Kenna invited the woman to speak to her current events class.

“I got suspended for three days,” she said with a laugh.

Now she feels she must react to the message from the bishop that she might be voting the wrong way.

“I think the bishop of Bismarck has brought this to a new level where he is bringing politics into church and as a responsible voter I have to say that’s wrong, and how do I respond that?” she said.

“I could stand up and walk out of church (while the letter is read) but I think that would be disrespectful to our priest,” she said.

Instead, she and others plan to stand outside Holy Family during Masses on Sunday.

Although she will wear a Heitkamp button, it’s not about campaigning, she said, adding she hopes many wear buttons of all sorts.

“I don’t think it’s a protest; I think it’s just an awareness-building exercise,” she said. “I just want people to examine their consciences and then vote the way they feel is consistent with their beliefs. I don’t want to be told that in church.”

Complete Article HERE!

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The nun who became a sex therapist

Dr Fran Fisher’s latest book blows the lid off the repressed sexuality of convent life. And it’s a subject the former nun knows first hand

By Joanna Moorhead

From nun to sex therapist isn’t an obvious career path but, says the former Sister Jane Frances de Chantal, “when you’ve been starved for a while, you certainly appreciate the feast at the end of it”.

In the Name of God, Why?: Ex-Catholic Nuns Speak Out about Sexual Repression, Abuse & Ultimate Liberation  by Dr. Fran Fisher

Today, Sister Jane is Dr Fran Fisher, a California “sexologist” in US-speak. But she was born and raised in Yorkshire and entered a Franciscan convent in Derbyshire aged 18. She left two years later, met and married an academic, and moved to the US. It wasn’t until she was in her 40s, she says, that she began to understand how much her Catholic upbringing, and her experience of being a nun, had damaged her sexual instincts.

With her children growing up, she saw a course in sex therapy advertised and her interest was immediately piqued. “I enrolled, and what happened next blew my head off. One day the tutor said we were going to discuss our masturbation history and I thought, can I really do this? Somewhere inside I was still a nun even after all these years … I was still sexually naive. I realised that the legacy of my time in the convent was the cause of most of the problems in my marriage. It had been drummed into me as a novice that I didn’t really have ownership over anything, even my own body.”

Fisher decided to combine her new professional direction, running workshops and counselling, with her own past, and to find out whether other former nuns had had similar experiences: the result is a book in which she interviews 28 women who, like her, took vows of poverty, chastity and obedience only to later leave orders. She talked to them about their sexuality before, during and after their time in the convent and discovered many similarities. “Most of the women I interviewed had been raised in strict Catholic families. Many had an alcoholic father. Quite a few had a history of physical and/or sexual abuse. A lot of them described the convent as a safe place to go.”

Fisher, who is now in her early 60s, realised that some of the traits of her own childhood were typical – in particular the fact that both her Irish Catholic parents had wholly negative attitudes towards sex. Her father, she says, almost always described women in pejorative terms; her mother, meanwhile, thought sex was “dangerous, dirty, vile, nasty and filthy”. When Fisher, then aged 14, feared she was pregnant – after an episode of petting that didn’t involve intercourse – her mother fuelled her fears, leaving her with a sense of “never wanting to have anything to do with a man again”.

The convent had the allure of a place where women were pure and mysterious and – most importantly – safe. But once inside its walls, her sexuality began to surface. Fisher became increasingly unhappy, lost a lot of weight, and eventually left the convent one Saturday morning while all the other sisters were at mass. She was, she says, still as naive about sex as she was when she arrived. But that wasn’t the case with all the women she interviewed. “Those who spent decades in a convent had usually experienced a sexual awakening. Some had relationships with other nuns, some with priests, some with laypeople.”

Some of them, too, talked to Fisher about how they were aware of sexual abuse that was going on in the Catholic church – but most, she says, were unable or unwilling to do anything about it. “Very few nuns were whistle-blowers,” she says. “When you’re a nun, you give away your ability to judge a situation.” Obedience meant not taking the lead and not questioning those who were obviously in positions of authority – such as male priests.

Some of the women in the book describe exploitative and unequal sexual relationships with priests – relationships they later questioned but which, at the time, they accepted as “necessary” for the men. As for having a healthy, “normal” sexual relationship, some of the women Fisher interviewed were middle-aged before this happened for the first time. “One woman described having intercourse for the first time aged 52. Another told me that when she first got a boyfriend, aged 50, she had sex every night for the first two or three months. Her partner thought he was going out with an Amazonian – but she said to him: “I’ve waited half a century for this, just lie back and shut up!'”

Fisher, like some of those she interviewed, did eventually experience a happy and more typical sex life. But she is fiercely critical of the Catholic system that allows naive young women (these days, more usually they are from Africa or Asia rather than Europe or North America) to uproot themselves from their families and enter a convent.

“The practice of taking young women (or men) from a childhood of indoctrination and expecting them to make a lifelong commitment to celibacy in their early 20s is clearly wrong,” she says. “And it’s still going on. Not long ago, I saw some young nuns being interviewed on TV. I saw their faces, and I thought: it’s still happening. There are still young women in some parts of the world for whom a convent offers a sanctuary from difficult questions about sex, an education, opportunities. But it’s running away from life, and there’s a huge toll in terms of individual fallout down the line. The church shouldn’t allow it to happen.”

Complete Article HERE!

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The Church hates the gays more than it loves its own.

File under the category: The Church hates the gays more than it loves its own. Churches are closing, schools are closing, food banks are underfunded, and shelters for homeless people are shuttered. More and more people are living on the edge of financial collapse…

BUT

Catholic Church Ponied Up More Than $1 Million To Fight Marriage Equality

Forget that vow of poverty: The Roman Catholic Church has shelled out more than $1 million to fight various marriage-equality initiatives, according to a new report from the Human Rights Campaign.

The study shows that the millennia-old institution has donated more than $1.1 million to anti-equality initiatives, including ones fighting gay-marriage measures in Washington, Maryland and Maine—and one supporting a gay-marriage ban in Minnesota, where it has given more than $608,000 to support a constitutional amendment defining marriage as between a man and a woman. (That’s more than half the campaign’s budget.)

Today, the Church is now the top religious donor for anti-equality efforts, with more than $640,000 coming from the Catholic fraternal organization the Knights of Columbus.

Fortunately it looks like gay-rights advocates have been able to raise considerably more funds overall than anti-equality cronies. (HRC has contributed $7.3 million to marriage-equality campaigns in the past 12 months.).

Given that a majority of everyday Catholics actually support gay marriage, HRC president Chad Griffin says “The Church hierarchy owes the laity an explanation as to why they are spending this much money on discrimination, and at what cost to other crucial Church programs.”

In a statement, Jason Adkins of the Minnesota Catholic Conference replied, “Our marriage amendment activities, like our other activities, are aimed at fostering the common good.”
Thanks but no thanks, pal.

Complete Article HERE!

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Catholic Church errs in fighting same-sex marriage

There’s a delicious rebellion brewing in Washington state — the “other Washington,” as those of us based in D.C. like to say.

A group of 63 former Roman Catholic priests, with a total of 800 years service, supports Referendum 74, a ballot initiative that would make Washington the seventh state in the nation to legalize marriage between same-sex couples. The announcement of their support is designed to combat a church campaign against the measure that the San Francisco Chronicle describes as “aggressive.”

The church is issuing pastoral statements and releasing videos urging parishioners to vote against marriage equality.

Here’s a sampling:

— Bishop Joseph J. Tyson of the Diocese of Yakima, Wash., told his 41 parishes: “Once marriage is redefined as a genderless contract, it will become legally discriminatory for public and private institutions such as schools to promote the unique meaning of marriage. … This law will challenge our right to educate about the unique value of children being raised by his or her own mother and father in a stable home (sic).”

I understand why the church is undertaking an extensive political campaign against gay marriage. There’s no doubt that gay marriage goes against the very biased doctrinal interpretation of homosexuality often cited in the New Testament.

But if members of the Catholic hierarchy are worried about losing followers to other Christian churches, or want to capture the hearts of the next generation of Catholics, they’ll give up the fight.

It’s clear that young Americans of all faiths have been raised in a cultural environment that views LGBTQ couples as no different than heterosexual couples. The bishops are picking a fight over an issue they are not going to win.

The Chronicle sites a recent Elway Poll that pegged support for Referendum 74 at 57 percent. Gov. Christine Gregoire, a Democrat and an outspoken proponent for it, championed same-sex marriage legislation through the state chambers.

Similar measures are on the ballot in Maryland and Maine.

The church is taking on not just Catholic voters in those states or, one could posit, in the United States — Gallup poll last May on gay marriage showed half of Americans support it.

Ireland’s former president, Mary McAleese, this week told Irish state broadcaster RTE she supports gay marriage. Her views on social issues have drawn the ire of many an archbishop, including the former Archbishop of Boston Bernard Law, who called her “a very poor Catholic president.”

Her response: “I am not a Catholic president, I’m president of Ireland,” where “there were all sorts of people. I’m their president. I happen to be Catholic.”

It seems unwise for the church to take on such powerful politicians and social movements that are gaining mainstream support. The timing is particularly unwise when one takes into account how the church’s handling of the priest pedophilia scandal cost it credibility.

I am in awe of the gay rights movement’s progress on this issue. It seems LGBTQ leaders have been able to turn around public opinion on marriage equality in less than a decade. Too bad their sisters in the abortion-rights movement have not been as successful. Abortion is one topic on which the church, sadly, can keep up a successful crusade. But the church undoubtedly has a dwindling supply of social issues in its arsenal.

Complete Article HERE!

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Rev. Stan Sloan has dedicated his life to serving his fellow men

Stan Sloan is not your ordinary Reverend. As a former priest of the Diocese, he has dedicated his life to serving his fellow men, fallen in love, was out during his priesthood, stood up and since departed from the Roman Catholic Church, and even scarier assimilated back into the dating scene after his priesthood. What matters to Sloan is service and perspective – both, which are for and from the people he has helped and continues to help throughout his career.

Currently, as Chicago House and Social Service Agency’s CEO, Sloan has taken his passion for service and his perspective from his days at St. Leonard’s House where he aided former prisoners and homeless people and instilled it back into the community. With exciting, new endeavors with Sweet Miss Givings Bakery, the development of a TransLife Center, as well as events that include Dance for Life, an all-out dance party, at the Park West on September 15 and the charity’s annual speaker series featuring fashion designer Kenneth Cole in November, Sloan has made Chicago House his new Diocese.

TC: (Terrence Chappell) As the longest running CEO of Chicago House and Social Service Agency, it could be argued that you are Chicago House. Who were you before Chicago House?

SS: (The Rev. Stan Sloan) I was a Catholic priest in the Diocese of Tulsa, Oklahoma up until 1995. In 95′ I just decided that I couldn’t do that anymore. I liked what I was doing and I liked the people I was working with, but I couldn’t stand working for the Roman Catholic institution or the hierarchy.

TC: What was the turning point that moved you to transition out of the Roman Catholic Church?

SS: As gay men we under sell this a lot; being gay is so much more about whom you have sex with. I mean even if you’re a celibate gay man, your gay friendships are still important to you. So, if I had a Friday night off, I would go out with my gay friends – not to gay bars because I knew that was crossing the line, but I would go out to dinner with them. Again, I was not breaking any vows. So, the bishop of Tulsa called me in and said that you’re fixing with the gay community. I said yes, but I’m being celibate and that we’re all God’s people. He said it’s one thing to minister to them but it’s another to be friends with them.

TC: Wow. How did that make you feel?

SS: Yea. It’s horrible. It’s okay to minister to them but to not befriend them? You don’t befriend people when you’re actually contributing to the cause let alone their [Roman Catholic Church] stance on birth control. If it sounds like I’m bitter and angry, it’s because I am.

TC: What do you do with all that bitterness and anger?

SS: I exercise like a mad man. I love my work. I’ve got good friends.

TC: However, you didn’t always feel this way. What was it that attracted you to the priesthood?

SS: I always had a natural prayer life growing up as a child. My parents were devout Catholics, and I enjoyed going to daily mass. It was always just a natural fit for me. I actually came out and had a boyfriend before I was a priest.

TC: Oh really? How did that work out?

SS: When I was in seminary I was celibate. So, as I went through the boards to start going into seminary, they asked me if I was gay and I said yes. At the time it was much more permissive than it is now. The church has gone backwards. However, I said if I do this I’ll be celibate.

TC: How did your boyfriend at the time react to you deciding to become a priest?

SS: I told him at the time, Jimmy this is something I have to try and that chances are that I won’t like it and I will be back. We were both kids at the time – we were like 23. He told me if I do this, you do this and when you come back, I won’t be here. So, we broke up, and I went.

TC: But then you quit the Catholic Church.

SS: Yup and never once did I think that I made the wrong decision. It was hard. You grieve it like you grieve a divorce. But, I was lucky that I happen to pick the Episcopal Church as my next step. We just okayed doing gay marriages, so the Episcopal Church is already ahead. I just feel like in the idea world, the Churches or religion in general should lead the rest of the world on social justice issues. However, instead you have ridiculous groups who do just the opposite. I’m very proud to be a part of denomination that is at the forefront of equality, sexual equality, and gender nonconforming issues.

TC: And then you transitioned over to serving and helping homeless people.

SS: Yes. Serving homeless people really puts perspective around your life and whatever is getting you down. You get to see people who have every reason to not have any hope but they do and they are excited about moving forward with their lives. Every day I get to make a difference.

TC: What kind of perspective did that give you at the time?

SS: I was just this naïve, white kid who grew up in Texas in middle-class America. I remember my first day at St. Leonard’s. I was working with all ex-offenders who just got out of prison. I was afraid of these guys. I’ve never been around a population like this. So, I went in and I had to talk to these guys. I started talking to them and I’m thinking to myself I’ve got two master’s degrees and so on. But then I realized that they were way more afraid of me then I was of them. For instance, I’m a part of the world they want to break into – mainstream society.

TC: How did this perspective help you at Chicago House?

SS: Well one of the things Chicago House gets to do on a daily basis is that we get to take our donors and show them the lives of our residents. I invite people all the time to come. It’s great because different people from different factions of our society can meet. We’re not as different as we think we are.

TC: Is there a story of a particular resident or someone that you have helped that stands out?

SS: One of my first days at St. Leonard’s House, I met a guy who I was working one on one with – helping him with his resume and stuff like that. It was like a light bolt when I was working with this guy; this guy’s IQ is off the charts. This guy is way smarter than I am. We stayed in touch and he did a good job while he was at St. Leonard’s House. He wanted to start up his own computer business. I gave him some money to help him get it started. Now, he owns his own computer business and has a home in Lake Forest. Mind you at the time he was just out of prison and would’ve been homeless if he wasn’t staying at St. Leonard’s House.

TC: When you started at Chicago House, you were still a priest in good standing but no longer a part of the Diocese. So, that means you could start dating. How was that?

SS: I didn’t remember from being 23 of how horrible dating was but I learned very quickly it’s a horrible process (laughs). I remember I had this over-the-top romantic idea that I would fall in love with the right one and wouldn’t have to date very much. Of course that’s not true, that’s not how life works.

TC: How was your “first” date?

SS: I signed up with The Smelts for no other reason because I decided that I wanted to date and that I need to find a husband. There was an adorable guy named Seth Hoff, who is still here in town, and I saw him and I thought he was so hot. So, I just found out his name and I just cold called him. I told him I was at swim practice today and that I saw him and asked him out to dinner. He said that I was the guy with no body fat. He said yes and we went on a few dates. I mean I was insane, so it must have been crazy for him. For instance, we would have fun on the date and instead of saying, “Hey, let’s talk soon,” I’d just say, “Can we get another date down?”

It was a very good, funny introduction into the dating world. (Laughs)

TC: What are some exciting, new developments for Chicago House?

SS: I’m excited to announce that Little Miss Muffet will take on Sweet Miss Giving’s product line. They have licensed our brand name and the internship program will operate out of their factory. Little Miss Muffet will give us a dime off every cookie, off every cupcake, and biscotti they will sell. Right now, we are trying to see how we are going to position ourselves with places like Costco and stuff since they are a national baker and they are already in all those places.

Our other big development is our TransLife Center. It will be in a gracious, old mansion where the first floor will be an emergency drop-in center for trans adults who just need to get off the streets for a day. The upstairs rooms will be built as well. There will be nine bedrooms for transgender men and women who are homeless and who need to get their life together. We will be hiring a full-time career counselor who will be transgender himself or herself who will be helping people with employment. We will have a doctor from Children’s Memorial Hospital who will be putting in weekly hours at the TransLife Center connecting people with care, since there is a huge instance of abuse of transgender people by medical professionals. So, as far as I know it will be the most comprehensive service offered to transgender people. We’re very excited about this.

TC: What do you want the LGBT community as a whole to take from Chicago House’s move in the direction of helping and aiding the trans community?

SS: We’ve made good progress as an LGB community and it’s time to start embracing our transgender brothers and sisters.

TC: What are some upcoming events Chicago House has coming up in the future?

SS: We will be having our One Night Stand event at the Park West on September 15. It will be a dance party. We’ve got all sorts of performers. Keith Elliott, who started Dance for Life and who started the burlesque show for TPAN will be a part of the event, so you know it’s going to be brilliant.

November 2 we’ve got Kenneth Cole coming for our speaker series. Kenneth Cole is the national head of the American Foundation of AIDS Research. So, he’s incredibly knowledgeable and will be a fantastic speaker.

TC: What do you want your legacy to be?

SS: That people’s lives are better because you existed.

To find more information about Chicago House visit www.ChicagoHouse.org.

Complete Article HERE!